Day 5 of P90X, and I'm starting to slack a little. It is now 10:12 PM, and I've only completed half of my workout for the day. I did Ab Ripper X, which is around 40 minutes of abdominal exercises. I have been in a terrible mood today, which has affected my motivation level and my interactions with others. Today is President's Day, the kids are out of school, and I had requested to have the day off from work, for which I was approved. But last week, I missed those couple hours when I was frantically searching for my keys, plus I missed the following day when my daughter was home from school sick. So... I went in to work today, leaving my sleeping babies with their sleeping father, who worked from home all day. I left the beautiful snow-covered ground to go to an office where hardly anyone showed up for work, and when I arrived, my supervisor (who I had a 10:00 make-up meeting with) wasn't even there yet. She came in later, around 11:00. Coworkers said, "I thought you were supposed to be off today". Ugh, I wish I'd just gone with that idea. I had the meeting at 11 once my supervisor showed up, and it was one of those, hold-on, let-me-close-the-door type of meetings, because apparently I stated some sincere concern and desire to help one of my mental health clients, which she referred to as counter-transferrence, and apparently that's not really that good. I was simply stating that, as a counselor, I wanted to help my client (who is at risk of falling due to medical and physical issues) move from a two story apartment into a ground level apartment because her community has one available for her. I was merely stating I wanted to help this person and needed to find resources to help her successfully move by March 2nd. I believe I came off sounding like I was taking on my client's stress, when what I'm supposed to be doing is encouraging her to figure out a resolution on her own. Problem is, she is so limited in what she can do, and in reality I will only be meeting with this person 4 or 5 times before March 2nd. That means there will be a lot of prep work involved, including cleaning out closets, packing items, finding a truck, and finding strong men (or women) to assist with moving large pieces of furniture. That is a lot to get done in 4 or 5 meetings which last 1-2 hours in length.
So, after the meeting, I did the administrative part of my job, which includes reading & writing. That sounds funny, I know. I am a writer for the agency and I write about our clients and their symptoms and behaviors and send my work off to their insurance companies to hopefully get them approved for our services. I also supervise other counselors' notes to make sure they are lookin' good. While the paperwork aspect of my job is not my favorite, it's easy work (shhhh, don't tell them I said that), and it makes up the bulk of my hours. It pays the bills, in other words! I left work at around 4 o'clock today and I came home to a very grumpy husband who complained about how I didn't do this right and didn't do that right (around the house), and I just lost it. He was mad because I came home starving and fixed myself a salad. How could I do such a thing?? Not sure what his reasoning was there, just that he was angry that the house was a mess and he wanted to pick a fight with me, I guess. So, I basically told him where he could shove it, and moved on with my day. I know that isn't what a good, loving, submissive Christian wife should do, but that's what I did.
Moving on to now... I've done my Ab Ripper X workout, and although it is late, I am MAKING myself do the next portion of Day 5, which is Chest, Shoulders, and Triceps. I hope it's a short one because I'm exhausted. Something is just off with me today, not sure what it is. I have been extremely grumpy and even my kids' sweet little voices were just grinding on my last nerve earlier. Maybe it is that time of the month? TMI? Or maybe it is just exhaustion from working out/dieting, and frustration over lack of support in the home, plus extra frustration that my scale isn't cooperating with my weight loss goals. Okay, off to complete Day 5, and I'll post an update later....
*UPDATE* at 12:35 PM... I made myself do the Chest, Shoulders, Arms DVD which completed Day 5 of P90X. Again, my note to self for today is that I need to use lighter weights on anything with the word "Fly" attached to it, because my 20 lb'ers are too much. Even the trainer was using lighter weights. I had to double up on Chunky soup cans to do some of the exercises, which is just lame, but at least I completed the workout. Also, this workout consisted of like over a thousand pushups. No joke. I hated it. Since starting P90X, however, I've gotten stronger and better at doing pushups, which demonstrates progress. I do end up on my knees doing the girlie ones most of the time. Next time, I will make sure to go with lighter weights and do my best to stay off my knees. This workout was one hour long and pretty darn grueling. I will make sure to start it well before 10 PM next time... it would be a great morning workout if I could find a way to squeeze it into my schedule (without interruptions).
After finishing this workout, I feel better both physically and mentally. I feel guilty for being such a grouch earlier, but at the same time I still feel justified for my feelings. I need to learn to better cope with anger and frustration. And the husband needs to learn to shut it. How sweet. Ok, good night friends... tomorrow is a new day! :D
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